now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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