take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize
