Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Damn victory sex feels great
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
