She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
