Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I'm too high and old for this...
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
