Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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