I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize
