if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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