i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Randomize
