His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
