Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
