I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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