Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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