in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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