Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
