Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
