Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Randomize
