I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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