Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize