We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize