i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize