I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
