if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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