Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
it's like iHOP with fire
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
