I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
