is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
