I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Randomize
