So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize