i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
