The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
