Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Dick very happy bro
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
