He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I didn't notice because vodka
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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