Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Randomize
