It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
