it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
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