dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
