just come out here and I will go home with you...
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
