you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
