it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
