let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
