tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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