he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
worst night to have a conscience
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
