i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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