Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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