Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
