I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
wow bdsm is so cute
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize