She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize