I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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