hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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