Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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