would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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