Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize